When the road is long and you’d like to forget about adoption

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I love my kids and I love adoption but I don’t think I’m alone when I say that there are some days when I wish I could just forget about adoption. There are some days where I just want to be a Mom without the ‘adoptive’ part attached to it. There are some days when I wish attachment and bonding were automatically thrown into the mix the minute you signed on the dotted line. There are other days when I’m tired of coming up against a rigid Home Affairs and using all my energy and time to get seemingly nowhere. Some days when I long for sameness because if we’re honest here, it’s just easier – different usually equals hard. Sometimes adoption just feels like a long, hard slog and you can’t imagine coming through the other side. Continue Reading

Meet the AfroDaddy – Terence Mentor: The Dad with big hair & a bigger heart

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So, I know this blog is called ‘Heart Mama Blog’ and this series usually posts adoption stories from a Mom’s perspective but today we get to hear from a Dad, an ‘AfroDaddy’ to be specific! Terence is a blogger with his own Youtube channel – I’ve loaded some of my favourite videos of his at the  bottom of this post, so take a look. Terence and his wife Julie live down the road from us and we’ve met through mutual friends – if you ever find yourself in Rosmead Spar, keep one eye open for this Dad with a fro (and perhaps a kid or two!) and give him a hello and a pat on the back.

Tell us a bit about yourself and your family.

I’m a dad who is a little bit odd – in looks, taste and personality (but not too odd, I hope!). I’m married to beautiful, gracious, smart and wonderful Julie. (I say all this about her because it’s true, but also because it makes her SUPER uncomfortable)

We are the happy parents of 2 year old Liam, who we formally adopted in 2014, and 6 month old Eli, who was born last year. They are our sources of incredible joy and exhaustion. Continue Reading

Meet the Mama – Jane Maritz, new Cape Town Heart Mama

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Jane and I have something in common – we both walked the adoption journey with the same wonderful adoption agency, Wandisa. I met Jane and her family at a big family picnic arranged by Wandisa and we got to chat a little bit in between the distraction of toddler tears when countless big orange helium balloons flew up to the clouds and  general kid chaos. Thank you for sharing your story, Jane.

Tell us a bit about your family.

My husband, Adrian and I have been married for 2 years now, together for 5 years. We live in Cape Town. Adrian has lived in Cape Town his whole life, I was born in SA but grew up in the USA (in Denver Colorado) and moved back to SA when I was 21. Finally, after a very long but worthwhile wait, we were blessed with our son, Noah, in July of last year. And when I say blessed, I really mean it! He is the most chilled out, happy little soul who is always smiling, barely ever cries and he has slept through the night since the day he came home.

He’s a total daddy’s boy – ‘the two best friends that anyone could have’. I can’t believe it’s only been 6 months. I can’t imagine life without him. Continue Reading

‘Do your baby’s hair!’ – The beginner’s guide + review of Smooth ‘N Shine by Schwarzkopf

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As a white Mom of three black children, it is so important that I know how to care for my kids’ hair. It’s been fun learning and I’ve got a way to go, but that scene in Grey’s Anatomy where Bailey gives McDreamy a (very) hard time for bringing Zola to school with unkempt hair haunts me to action. I don’t want to be THAT Mom!

If you haven’t seen the clip I’m talking about, here you go: Continue Reading

Happy adoption day Miss Kira

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In our family, we celebrate birthdays and adoption days – the day that each child joined our family and became a Kynie. This means that our calendar is doubly full of celebrations which is wonderful and busy and wonderfully busy. Any excuse for a party, right? Today, Kira has been home for two years. Two short years. Two special years. Continue Reading